i'm such a fuck up
i'm angry at happy people
i'm jealous
i reek of envy
they're doing so good
i used to be doing good
in some way at least
now i'm nothing
i have nothing to show
nothing to tell
i have no talent
no passion
no will for hard work
i'm just here
like a failure
i know people try to tell me i'm not
but honestly
yes i fucking am
i mean it's a fact
people had such high hopes for me
shouldn't have come
already regret it
should've stayed in bed
why the fuck would you say that
"i better not gain more weight
than you're losing"
what
what the fuck
fuck you
fuck this
i'm so fucking tired of this shit
i get triggered so easily
but like
shut the fuck up
shut up
i don't want to hear it
i'm so done
i'm so done
i'm so fucking done
is it gonna be like this forever?
are people gonna keep talking about it
all the fucking time
fuck you
fuck all of you
every single one of you
fuck
you
why am i so fucking high maintenance
people don't owe me anything
especially when they don't know
or are ignorant on the subject
but i'm fucking tired
of having to fucking take it
and deal with it
and understand
and tolerate
and excuse
i'm fucking tired
i want it to be your turn
i want you
to understand
and be careful
and think about how it affects me
and learn about it
so i can be comfortable
not you
just for once
don't talk about how much i eat
don't talk about what i eat
don't talk about when i eat
don't talk about how i eat
don't talk about my weight
don't talk about my body shape
and you know what
maybe it would be asking too much
but don't talk about diets
don't talk about how you need to lose weight
don't talk about which food are good or bad
don't talk about how you judge people
based on their body shape
i mean fuck
you know
you know i'm anorexic
or maybe in your head
how i "used" to be anorexic
cause i gained some weight back
but in any case
you know
so what the fuck is going on
are you that naive
or stupid
or you just don't care enough to think about it
how can you not realize how hurtful it is
it's so fucking obvious
first of all if you had any common sense
and secondly if you can see how i react to it
you're exactly like him
i don't understand
how you don't understand
it's plain and simple