nothing has changed
was almost getting my hopes up
no but seriously
what the fuck am i doing
how am i ever gonna be better
that seems impossible
unimaginable
fuck
if i had just done it
cause
what's the plan now
survive until i can get into a clinic?
for how long?
will it be enough? will i have to go back?
am i ever gonna feel totally better
or is the kind of thing
where you have to fight everyday
to keep going
cause i'm not doing that
i don't care if it's how it works
if that's how everyone lives
i'm a lazy fuck
i'd rather sleep forever